So, you know that little break I’ve been on? It’s coming to an end soon and I’m just getting back to some sort of normal. Which sounds good, except that “normal” changes pretty often.
Every time I think I have a nice routine all carved out, everything gets turned on its ear and I have to start all over again. And, I get kinda ticked off. It’s not that all the changes in my life are bad.
They’re good, actually. Really good. I’m learning a lot. I’m having a great time. I’m experiencing things that make me feel warm and fuzzy…giddy, even.
And, I’m also getting majorly frustrated.
How can something fantabulous make me feel so unbelievably grrrr!? The short answer is because I’m anal and I like things all lined up in height order. And, color-coded.
The longer answer is that new experiences sometimes make me feel inept.
And, I’m used to doing things in a particular, “I know how to do this” way.
And, I don’t like change unless I can see it coming and know exactly how I’m going adjust.
And, because my confidence took a hit when I realized that I’m not exceptional at all these new things. Imagine that.
And, because change is hard.
Maybe even harder for a Type A personality like me. You’d think it would be easier. I see what the issue is. I come up with a plan. I turn it upside down and look for holes. Then, I execute said plan. That’s my MO for almost everything. It works.
But, it’s not working now.
So, the only thing I can do now is breathe. And, take one day at a time.
And, I hate that.